Killer-Kate and Luke Lackland: First pass on the horsey stuff, of which I know very little. I went through looking for major errors/ideas with the aid of Judith Tarr's extremely helpful Writing Horses, and her Horseblogging posts at Book View Cafe, both of which I can highly recommend. I don't seem to have committed any of the truly classic horrors, but several things could be a lot better, including:
* Remembering just how horsey aristocrats in a chivalric culture are, and adjusting their perceptions appropriately;
* Providing more basic horse-related infrastructure than appears to exist in the Northdales at present;
* Giving an impression that distinct horse-breeds (rather than mere specializations for function) really exist, even if nobody actually names one on-page;
* Fairfields seems strangely short of draught-horses and mules, which is about the last mistake those people would make;
* Cavalry types are going to be a lot quicker to foresee one of the things their enemy does to them in a big combat scene than I was, i.e. they'll have expected it out the gate, instead of waiting till half-way through the fight to catch on;
* I'm not convinced that one of the characters, even with expert assistance, can really travel in the manner presented;
* I don't follow through on all the implications of the Golden Margravine's superb equestrian skills, because when I wrote Katy Elflocks I was making Kate up as I went along, and I didn't know what she was going to turn out to be. The missing matter is, in retrospect, totally consistent with her character, and needs to be inclued in the redraft.
And the little details will be legion, but I knew that already, and that's for correction in the fine edit.
For horse people reading these posts: what most annoys you about the presentation of horses in fantasy when it's wrong, or pleases you when it's right? Who gives you a real sense that their characters are riding horses, instead of bicycles, cavalry canines or daydreams?
For non-horsey folk: what horse-related stuff throws you out of the story, or draws you in?
In other news, my home Internet was on the blink again this morning, so communications may or may not get irregular presently.
* Remembering just how horsey aristocrats in a chivalric culture are, and adjusting their perceptions appropriately;
* Providing more basic horse-related infrastructure than appears to exist in the Northdales at present;
* Giving an impression that distinct horse-breeds (rather than mere specializations for function) really exist, even if nobody actually names one on-page;
* Fairfields seems strangely short of draught-horses and mules, which is about the last mistake those people would make;
* Cavalry types are going to be a lot quicker to foresee one of the things their enemy does to them in a big combat scene than I was, i.e. they'll have expected it out the gate, instead of waiting till half-way through the fight to catch on;
* I'm not convinced that one of the characters, even with expert assistance, can really travel in the manner presented;
* I don't follow through on all the implications of the Golden Margravine's superb equestrian skills, because when I wrote Katy Elflocks I was making Kate up as I went along, and I didn't know what she was going to turn out to be. The missing matter is, in retrospect, totally consistent with her character, and needs to be inclued in the redraft.
And the little details will be legion, but I knew that already, and that's for correction in the fine edit.
For horse people reading these posts: what most annoys you about the presentation of horses in fantasy when it's wrong, or pleases you when it's right? Who gives you a real sense that their characters are riding horses, instead of bicycles, cavalry canines or daydreams?
For non-horsey folk: what horse-related stuff throws you out of the story, or draws you in?
In other news, my home Internet was on the blink again this morning, so communications may or may not get irregular presently.